Dutch | Spanish
I identify myself as both Dutch and Spanish as I am half Dutch and half Spanish. My Mum is from the Netherlands and my Dad is from Spain. My Mum was raised in a small town near Amsterdam, called Muiden, which is where I grew up as well. My Mum decided that she wanted to raise her family there too. My Mum never really left the city, except for when she did the Erasmus exchange during her studies. She went to Madrid, which is where she met my Dad, more specifically at a bus stop. My Dad originally was born in Germany because my Grandparents had to go and work there as Spain was under the rule of the dictator Franco. Soon after the birth of my Dad, they returned to Spain where he lived until he and my Mum decided to move to the Netherlands.
I think it was not very difficult for my parents to manage combining their different cultures as my Mum was very interested in the Spanish culture and language and as she knew a lot about it. Even though it was easy for my Mum to adapt to the Spanish culture, it was harder for my Dad to adjust to the Dutch culture as he did not know the language nor the culture. Nevertheless, I think that my siblings and I were raised with both the Dutch and Spanish culture. My Dad always spoke Spanish with us, and my Mum spoke at the beginning both and later mostly Dutch. As we live in the Netherlands, we knew more about the Dutch culture than the Spanish one. For that reason, from the age of seven I went to a Spanish school every Wednesday where I learnt everything about the Spanish culture, where I met other partly Spanish children and where I learnt how to read, write and speak in high-level Spanish. I did that for a little over nine years and I loved it. I think those classes shaped me into the woman I am today as my love for Spain and the Spanish culture really was stimulated and as I learnt more about myself and about my roots.
Even though my partner has a double identity as well, I do not think that my culture affects the way I choose my partner, but maybe it happens unconsciously as I really love it when people have a mixed identity or are from another country and culture because of the fact that I am very proud and happy about having two cultures. One could therefore say that I am drawn towards the unknown or the exotic, or simply put that I tend to like people who have different stories of which I can learn a lot. However, most of my friends are Dutch and do not have multiple identities which means that one can question whether my assumptions are true.
I believe that I am very lucky being half Spanish and half Dutch as these cultures have enriched my life. I feel like the Dutch and Spanish cultures combined complete each other. The Dutch culture for example is focused on working very hard and being very disciplined which are good characteristics, but it often results in individualism. The Spanish culture has taught me that there is more than solely working hard as family is very important for Spanish people. Thanks to my two identities I have learned to find a balance between working, studying and spending time with my family.
In my life I have experienced some (minor) challenges based on my mixed identity because of the feeling of not belonging, especially in Spain. In high school there were only three people who were not a hundred percent Dutch; there was a Polish girl, a guy who was half Dutch, half German and me. Some people put an emphasis on our other culture, but I believe it was always in a positive sense, or at least, I looked at it as something positive as I am proud of being half Spanish, half Dutch. I think the biggest challenge I face is that people in the Netherlands never think of me as being mixed-race, even though my surname is super Spanish. I am proud to be Spanish and I feel that I am more than just Dutch so I love to be recognized as both. Thus, I do not like it when people look surprised when I tell them that I am Spanish as well. I especially feel this way in Spain. As I grew up in the Netherlands, I do have a little accent when I speak Spanish. When I am in Spain, I approach people in Spanish, because it is my language and my country as well, but people often ask me where I am from or how it can be that I speak Spanish on such a high level. I think this is a shame, and it kind of makes me feel that I do not belong there or that I am not truly Spanish. Of course, it is true that I never lived in Spain, but I feel Spanish, I know everything about the culture and language and my family lives there so that kind of questions can be exhausting. It really feels like I have to prove and defend my identity.
I am very happy with my two cultures and I am proud of my two identities so I would not change anything if I was born again. I would want to return exactly the same. I think that my two cultures enrich each other and that they shaped me into the person I am today.