English | Indian
My Mother was born in India and my Dad was born in England. My Mother met my Father in a nightclub which she shouldn't have been in, but this time she had run away from a forced marriage so was estranged from her family. My Mother and Father were ground-breaking in a way. They set the path for others, they fought against what the norm may have been and all the hate and looks they got for being together.
At first it was difficult to merge the two cultures; some aspects were way easier than others. Food was easy as Mum would still cook in a traditional way curry’s etc and the whole family would enjoy. The dress sense was difficult for me. It felt really foreign as a child to wear certain clothes or to see my Mum in certain cultural clothes but she just did it and we learnt about them. I started to speak both languages, me and my brother wore both clothes. There wasn’t really a second thought about combining cultures, they just combined them and both parents were accepting of each other’s cultures.
I feel I am more open to choosing anyone and acceptance of anyone, but I’d be keen to have a partner who had a similar blending of cultures upbringing, unless you have been through this it’s very hard to explain. When I was younger it was often easier to just say nothing and deny everything but now I'm older I would never hide my identity.
I adore interracial relationships they are the path to world peace. It was so much harder for my Mum and Dad, they had so much more prejudice to go through battle after battle. Today it’s easier but we still have a long way to go.
Being mixed-race is now something that gives me an edge over others and makes me seem more interesting and most people want to know more. But there have been so many challenges, I’ve have had racist comments and have not been accepted by either culture fully at first. I've had to convince people I am both races and for them to be able to see me as both. I still today struggle with some of the traditional Sikh ways and values; they seem so foreign and not logical or scientific.
Taking my grandmother's ashes back to the Ganges was my first time in India. It was a very overwhelming experience, I travelled with all my cousins who were all born in England but look totally different from me. I felt like I stood out like a sore thumb as we travelled to the village. I even had a long line of children following me like I was the pied piper memorised at my looks. I learnt so much about the culture and the struggles the family had to face and the sacrifices. I got a huge understanding of why Mother behaved a certain way. I felt like it was a pivotal point in the understanding of my culture.
When you're young you don't really understand or think anything is different. Your Mum’s Brown, your Dad’s White, so what. Until someone has something negative to say and then you just get upset for a while and move on. I did like being mixed as a child as I didn't see anyone else who looked like me. As an adult I saw more and more and started to understand and appreciate that I had something unique and special. The older I get I feel like it will evolve and will become even more appreciative of being mixed and not care what others think.
I want more voices to be heard and for it to become the norm to speak about many cultures blending into one. I don't feel like the token diversity box ticking exercise. I'm pursuing a career in acting to pave the way for generations to come to feel accepted. I want to reflect the society we live in and let me know if I can do it so can you.
If I had the opportunity to be reborn I would want to be exactly the same, it’s what makes me, me. I would not be the same if I didn’t have the same experiences.
After the death of George Floyd, I think that things have started to change but I feel like it's just the beginning, there are still a lot of narrow minded people out there who just don't accept others who are slightly different and will always put barriers in the way, we need to knock these down. The realisation that actual being mixed is a beautiful thing to quote Jassa Ahluwalia 'were both not half' we are more not less.
There is so much work that needs to be done, it's a lack of understanding of each cultures and ignorance of not wanting to learn why the other people feel that way or why it is a racist comment. It needs to be taught from a young age in schools, no one is born racist. It’s what others are teaching them. The pay gap needs to change, more opportunities need to be created in every sense of the word 'you can't be what you can't see'.