British/Italian | Jamaican
My Dad originates from Jamaica and came to the UK in 1953 when the UK asked for Caribbean Islands to come over to work in the UK to fill jobs. He arrived on a banana boat, which is another story to tell. My Dad was 28 when he arrived and came to live in North-West London. My Mum is White British with an Italian Father who she didn’t really know so I don’t know much about that side of my family unfortunately. My Mum was born in Newcastle on Tyne and had 6 siblings. My grandmother couldn’t cope and fostered 2 of the siblings, my Mum being one of them. My Mum then was evacuated to Buckinghamshire where her and her brother were to meet her foster parents who fostered them throughout her childhood. Although she was always in touch with her birth Mother. She moved to London at the age of 18 where she met my Dad in Tottenham court road.
My parents had it very bad indeed being a White lady with a Black man in London. They tried to get accommodation together which wasn’t possible with No Black/No Irish /No dogs on every place that they tried to rent out. They had 3 children by this time (my sisters) I wasn’t born yet and my Mum figured out that she would need Dr Barnados to help with her children as they then didn’t have a roof over their heads. So my 3 sisters went into a home for 3 months with my parents visiting every day until they were able to get accommodation. I take my hat off to my Mum for all the things she went through, but she was a strong lady and wasn’t going to be beaten or penalised for loving a man who was Black. She fought tooth and nail with racism in the late 50s which were rife.
We can’t help who we fall in love with. There are going to be battles just like we have always had but I think it is just slightly easier today, but I think there will always be people and institutions who will have a problem with it. And that it is not a problem for us but for people and institutions. My culture had no effect on me choosing my partner at all. Saying that my partner who I have been with for 35 years is also mixed-race and he also has his own horrific stories too on the battles of being mixed-race.
As far as I know I have had no positive experiences of being mixed race. As my skin colour is Black or Brown I should say and I feel I have faced the same racism as someone who is Black. Although I am told the lighter the skin the better you are treated which I am not able to comment on as my skin colour is Brown.
I could tell many stories. I have been with a group of White people who think its ok to be racist. As being the only Black person there and mixed they think its ok as I can’t ‘flip both ways’. People don’t realise it doesn’t work like that and I will call them out. Even more so now, when I was younger I would swallow it as I was the minority. Not anymore.
I like English food but would cook more Caribbean food which is my favourite. My preference in music is quite wide but do listen to More Reggae and Soul music. I have indeed visited my native countries on many occasions which I call my happy place, i.e. Jamaica.
I have gotten older and wiser and look back on things that I have been subjected to. At the time I never saw it as conscious bias or institutional racism, or just racism it was a learning curb indeed. But I have instilled all my experience into my children so that they don’t stand or go through what I have or indeed my parents had gone through.
If I had the opportunity to be reborn I would come back again myself. I am proud of my heritage and who I am and am not ashamed. I am happy in life; I had a happy childhood and I can only thank my parents for the way they nurtured me to be a strong Black lady.