English | Afro-Guyanese
When I was 16, I was arrested wrongfully and unfairly, and was given a youth reprimand. This, I was told, would stay on my record until I was 100, according to the law at the time. It led to immense guilt and shame. But it also led to my interest in the criminal justice system, and the racism and classism it upholds and reproduces.
I remember my Mum saying that she shouldn't have gone with me for questioning, that my Dad should have gone because he is White. She thought the police might have acted more harshly because they knew I was mixed. I remember thinking that was silly at the time. With my poker straight, relaxed hair and pale skin, I didn't think I would be racially profiled. But, years later, I submitted a Subject Access Request to the Police National Computer system to look at my record. They had described my physical features, eye colour, height, etc. They had written that my race was Black. I found it perplexing. They didn't even describe me as mixed-race. It made me wonder if my Mum was right after all. The arresting officers told me at the time that, after questioning, they believed me, but that their superior wanted to make an example out of me. It's hard not to think, now, that race wasn't involved.
It might be cheesy to say but my Mum really is my role model. Only in adulthood have I really come to appreciate what a unique person she was. She possessed a rare intelligence that was greater than knowing facts, speaking many languages, and being a wonderful secondary school teacher. She also had a level of perception and intuition that I have yet to see in anyone else; an emotional intelligence that is so rarely coupled, as it was, with street and book smarts. Not to mention her wicked sense of humour and fantastic laugh.
She suffered on and off with cancer from the age of 45 to 64, when she passed away. Throughout this time she was brave and selfless. Somehow, she still went into work, despite the chemo, she was still a wonderful Mother to me, a dutiful daughter to her elderly parents, a dear friend to many. She really encompasses the type of person we need more of in the world.
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