Trinidadian | English

Mum came here in the 60s to work as a nurse, Dad lived across the road from her accommodation in a bachelor pad! I think it was very hard for my Mum to fit into British culture and be surrounded by people who didn't really understand where Trinidad and Tobago was, let alone the culture and heritage.         

Perhaps not so much as a child but the older I got (teenage and beyond) the more interested in my Trinidadian heritage I became, and as a result the closer I am to the Caribbean side of my family. I am lucky enough to be able to visit regularly and spend as much time as I possibly can with my family and feel just as close to both sides of me now. I am not sure that I would say I follow any traditions from either culture specifically and just try to embrace all that I can. However, the Trinidad carnival is a must!               

In many ways I assume things for me were simpler than other mixed people growing up based on other people's perceptions, as I don't 'look' mixed or whatever mixed is indeed supposed to look like! With straight blonde hair and fair skin most people just assume I am just another White person in England! That in itself presented its own challenges as I grew up and tried to find my 'place'. I think I weirdly always felt like I had something to prove and also fought fairly strongly against the perception that mixed people always look a certain way. Today I'm proud of my mixed heritage and most importantly do not only not care what people think but enjoy challenging stereotypes!            

I wouldn't say I was ever isolated but I certainly feel like I have never really 'belonged', despite how I look I was never really White enough for White people and didn't look mixed enough for mixed people. That's certainly how I felt as a child and I think as a culture we need to do more to raise awareness and not instantly try to label kids as either 'Black, White or Asian'. As an adult it doesn't bother me as I'm comfortable in my own skin and refuse to be put into a box. Most other Caribbean people, especially Trinidadians, will also understand that mixed isn't as straightforward as Black and White by any means, and my Mum's Caribbean heritage means she too is mixed Black, White, Indian and much more too.        

I honestly can’t pinpoint one personal challenge that has shaped me but I would say every interaction where someone has assumed something has shaped my identity. It's taught me a lot about people, stereotypes and unconscious bias. I try always to not judge and see my role as being there to educate, each of those moments has helped me to become more confident and comfortable with myself. You don't need to 'try and fit in'. You are beautifully unique and if there is no box on the form that you fit into, draw your own box and find your own way! The people you are meant to spend time with find you and don't spend more than a second thinking about someone who chooses to judge you based on their own circumstances. 

I also think the term 'mixed-race' is potentially problematic. As thinking evolves, so does language: I prefer to think of myself as being of mixed heritage, and of one human race. I've never hidden my identity, if anything, I've gone out of my way to display it!     

I have many role models but in this context I would say Lenny Kravitz or Barack Obama. Lenny quite famously spoke out about something many mixed children have to understand and I think the more people speak about this, the more things will improve. Kravitz expanded on his ethnicity when talking about how he filled out the 'race' sections on school forms, “my Great-Grandmother’s Cherokee Indian. My Father’s a Russian Jew. My Mom’s Bahamian. [I thought], 'What the hell do I put on this thing?'. The teachers came over and [said], ‘Black. That’s what you are.’ And so, so many parts of your heritage are just squashed. ‘That’s it. You’re that.’ I didn’t like that”.                 

I admire all cultures ( at least those I have so far been fortunate enough to have some exposure to) and think that everyone's culture can teach you something. I'm making it my mission to travel and experience as many different countries and cultures as possible!  

I'm fortunate enough to run my own business, but as much as it's high on my agenda to ensure representation, it's also harder than it should be. Many issues start way back with education and ensuring everyone has the opportunities to obtain the qualifications and experience required. Having said that, I'm proud that we have a team that represents many cultures, histories and countries and I think we provide a better service due to this.