Northern Irish | Algerian
I identify as a non-religious, heterosexual female. My Mum is from Northern Ireland and my Dad is from Algeria. My Mum went to work in the Alpes in France when she left school. My Dad left Algeria when he was in his early 20’s and had been living and working there when they met. I was then born in Northern Ireland but moved back to France when I was a few months old and lived there for 7 years. French was my first language so when we moved back to Belfast, I had to learn how to speak English. Unfortunately, I can’t speak French anymore and I was never taught Arabic, so I feel guilty at times, but I don’t let this stop me and communicate in any way that I can! Normally if people ask me where I grew up, I say Belfast, as it’s my home and where I went to primary and secondary school, and it’s where all my family and friends live.
I never noticed that I was mixed-race when I was younger, but I always struggled with my name, as it was always something kids made fun of. This was difficult as I knew I was different and didn’t want to be. I also knew that I was different when I had to have English classes when I was in primary school and not everyone had these. Growing up in Northern Ireland meant that religion was very important and knowing what religion you were was even more essential. My Dad was a Muslim and my Mum a Protestant, but I didn’t personally feel any strong religious pull. When kids used to ask me ‘what are you?’ (as in a Catholic or Protestant) I used to say I didn't know, which again wasn’t the right thing to say as everyone else seemed to have a strong identity.
I grew up in Belfast so the culture that I experienced the most was Irish culture; however we had some rules like we weren’t allowed to eat pork or go to a Christian church as my Dad is a Muslim (although, my Irish Granny brought us to church in secret when we stayed at her house!) I didn’t know much about Algerian culture. I had visited when I was 10 years old and felt annoyed and confused that women had to stay at home while the men went out, and that women had to cover up so much more than men did. I left Algeria not really wanting to go back again. However, I returned to Algeria about 3 years ago with my brother and felt more connected to my family there and had a deeper understanding of the land, culture and religion. I felt very welcomed and loved by family members who hadn’t seen me in years, which made me feel more part of that family. However, I’m very lucky that my Irish family has always been supportive and accepting of our diverse (and crazy) family!
I always knew that I was different from everyone else in school. I was bullied growing up about my name and I had a strong sense of not belonging anywhere, as we moved around so much. My Father experienced a lot of racism living in Ireland and was once hospitalised by a racist attack, and my brother has experienced discrimination for being a Muslim. These were tough times however, luckily, I have a multicultural family who are very open minded and supportive. On a lighter note, at times, I have had people not believe that my name is my real name and that I’ve given myself a hippy, spiritual name as I’ve travelled a lot! They see that I am White and don’t believe me! I’ve also at times had to try convincing other Algerians that I’m half as they don’t believe me either!
When I was growing up, I moved around so much that now in my adult life, I am constantly moving and travelling. I find it hard settling in one place. However, I believe that this has allowed me to explore other cultures from around the world and I’ve made so many incredible friends from across the globe. I’m a very open-minded person and I’m very lucky that I’ve got family from around the world (my Aunt is Indian; my cousin is Polish, and my sister-in-law is Iraqi) so our family gatherings are always interesting! In relation to finding a partner, it doesn’t matter to me where they’re from, as long as they’re respectful, open-minded and amazing!
I think being mixed-race has had a positive effect on my work and personal life, it’s usually a good conversation starter and I feel that it breaks down barriers. I work with young people from different cultures and backgrounds and they are usually surprised to know that I am mixed-race, it starts an open conversation around culture, diversity and respect for each other no matter where they come from.
I identify with being Irish more than I do being Algerian. I spent most of my life living in Belfast and I love Northern Ireland so much! It’s such an amazing place, with great people and an amazing history. I visited Algeria when I was young and didn’t go back for years due to having a difficult relationship with my Father. Also having a difficult relationship with my Father pushed me away from that side of me as I didn’t want anything to do with it. However, I returned to Algeria 3 years ago with my brother and seeing family that I haven’t seen for years was really nice, and I felt more of a connection with Algeria. I physically look like my Algerian family more than my Irish family; however, it was difficult not being able to communicate with them.
Now I’m older, I really love being different and having this amazing story to tell. It has allowed me to connect with people from all over the world and it has allowed me to explore more of who I am. I think it’s really exciting to be mixed-race right now, and it makes the world a more interesting place to live. I’m personally fascinated by people’s heritage and where they come from. I love that everyone has their own story and again, I feel that people sharing their stories breaks down barriers and promotes respect.
If I had the opportunity to be reborn, apart from returning bilingual, I’d come back the exact same! I’m proud of who I am every day and I’m proud of where I come from!