British... | Jamaican [full ethnicity in story]

Photo credit: provided by subject

British/Swedish/Finnish/Indian | Jamaican

I identify as mixed-race, my Mum was born in England, Manchester and my Dad was born in London. Both my parents met in Manchester at university. My Mum is Jamaican, and my Dad is mixed British, Indian, Swedish and Finnish.

My parents split when I was only 2 years old. At this point I was raised as a Black child, which I can understand having a Black mother. I have many mixed-race cousins so never questioned my skin colour. However, it wasn’t until I went to live with my Father at age 12 that I started to understand I’m mixed-race. This has been an incredible journey ever since.

Mixed relationships are beautiful. Today I believe many more people of mixed heritage or not are willing to embrace cultural and racial differences. For my parents, they both suffered embarrassment and rejection and I was the one in the middle of all of this and suffered for many years. I’m not Black, I’m not White, I’m mixed-race and aim to embrace and love all of my DNA. 

I have in the past dated men of mixed origin which to some extent gave me comfort and normality! Now I am dating an Italian man who is very proud and comfortable with his heritage. Having spent many years educating myself and understanding who I am, I am now more than ever confident in sharing my culture and learning new things as I go along! One day, my kids will be even more mixed than me and I will have to ensure that they embrace their culture and will always be proud. 

I love to travel and depending on the country I travel to, people always assume I’m one of them! I always feel a sense of love when this happens. I have been told, I look Moroccan or Cape Verdean or Portuguese. 

I haven’t experienced challenges directly, but I often look around in meetings and ask myself considering we’re a very multicultural country. Why in 2020 am I the only person of colour in a room of middle-class men and women? Meghan Markle and Harry, hit me a lot. To some degree, that made me understand a thing or two! 

I was raised by a Black woman for the first 12 years of life. I have fond memories, waking up to reggae and helping with the dinner which always had a Caribbean influence. My Grandparents on my Father’s side were born in India, so they often tell me stories about coming to the UK in the late 50’s early 60s. I have only visited Sweden! Jamaica is on the list of places to visit. 

I grew up not knowing anything and assumed I was Black as that was what I was told by everyone around me. Now as an adult, I know who I am and without my Mother in my life I have held onto those childhood memories and created my own mixed identity. 

I would love for my parents to have been together and if not to have co-parented properly. I would have loved for my Mother to have loved me! I’m sure that would have had a great impact! 

Growing up with a mixed heritage is different for everyone. One thing I have learnt, is to ask as many questions as you can. The older generation are harder to speak with. Now, with persistence my Father’s side opens up a lot more and we can speak about race for me and for them!