Bulgarian | Türkish-Alevi
My ‘biological Father’ is a relatively recent revelation (a lockdown discovery). My identity for most of my life has remained hidden and then add to that the context of my 'biological Father' keeping my existence hidden from his family... Let's just say it is a complicated affair! I was brought up with the idea that my background should always be kept hidden, whether it be from not disclosing where my parents are from or (for example) being encouraged from a young age to lighten my skin in a bid to ‘fit in’ with the Western idea of beauty. As an adult I have come to understand that differences can be celebrated and the importance of being happy in your own skin.
Having been brought up in the UK with a connection predominately only with my Mum's Bulgarian side of the family, one could say it was a mix of British and Bulgarian culture. My immediate Bulgarian family do not speak English and with my Mum wanting me to fully integrate in the UK she was afraid of speaking Bulgarian to me. However I was a curious, talkative and determined kiddo who loved my Baba and learnt the language from my deep connection with her, my Bulgarian cousins and friends.
My looks are often open to commentary whatever my association. As an artist, the musical world bridges the gap between my struggling with the feeling of ‘home’ and sense of belonging. From the perspective of the opera world, it is a predominantly Western European tradition. Many of the opera storylines are centred around cultures that have been marginalised. Can we keep on reproducing these genius compositions at the expense of not acknowledging the impact they make on the cultures in question? Similarly, eradicating that part of history (stretching from the Baroque period until now) removes the opportunity to use the magic of music to build the bridge of mutual understanding and harmony with the hindsight of the past. If we were to go down this route, then we will surely lose the moral of the story and there is a reason why myths, legends, fairy stories and folk tales stay around.
Sign up to Patreon or Subscribe to our website to read more stories