British | Korean/Vietnamese
I think like most mixed people, when I was younger I always felt like life would be so much easier if I could just identify as or look like just one of my races. This was amplified by the fact I never felt fully integrated with groups on either side. However as I grew up in Tanzania in an international school I was surrounded by quite a few mixed-race kids and they helped me feel like I wasn't the only one. Nowadays, while I haven't fully left behind that desire to identify with one race, I have come to appreciate my mixed-race origin much more, especially in the ways it lets me understand and empathise with people. During secondary school in Jersey I lost my connection to other mixed-race kids as it is a largely White English community, but ever since coming to a large international University I feel being mixed-race is very common-place and I've felt a lot more at peace with my mixed identity.
Right at the start of my time at university I met and became friends with a group of Koreans for the first time. I really liked them and felt that it would be my opportunity to connect with my Korean side. They accepted me as Korean and even added me to a group chat with a few other Koreans. However, they all wanted to communicate in Korean and my lack of Korean language skills at the time prevented me from getting closer to them. This was one of the first times I really felt uncomfortable with my mixed identity and questioned who I was, as being the only Asian, I was seen as Korean in secondary school but then, that image seemed broken. This really put me on the path to learning Korean and going to live there for the first time which really helped me once again feel Korean.
The advice I would give to anyone struggling with their identity is to really try to find people who can relate to your mixed identity either online or in-person and just talk to them and relate with them. There are much more of us in the world than you think and connecting with people who have shared experiences can help you come to terms with yourself and your identity.
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