British | Bajan

I identify as a mixed-race, British woman. My Mother is from England, and my Father from Barbados. He has mixed heritage himself as his Grandfather was a White Scottish landowner who had a relationship with a Black Bajan woman. My Mother’s Grandmother was Jewish, Polish descent. My parents met in London’s Leicester square while out with friends.

My childhood had a combination of both cultures. Art and literature were a huge part of my life. My Mother, an artist herself, read us all the classics from Lewis Carroll to CS Lewis, passing on her love of literature to me. Which led me to study the subject at university and become a journalist and finally an Editor. My Father told us stories about his own childhood in the Barbados countryside, which always sounded very idyllic with goats running around. Endless sunshine and beach visits after school. His own Father owned a bakery, so he loved baking himself. On Sunday’s he would bake Bajan delicacies he’d been taught as a child. Such as sweet bread as well as introducing us to rice and peas. Music was integral to our lives and always on in the house. Mum loved Hendrix and the Rolling Stones. Dad played Bob Marley and Gregory Isaacs, old school calypso and reggae. I grew up playing piano and flute and mixing the different musical influences around me to compose my own songs, while my brother went on to become a musician. My parents were both very political. Politics was always discussed at home and we had friends who were mixed-race couples who had escaped apartheid in South Africa. I was always aware of racism and injustice and developed a love of campaigning from both parents. It’s the reason why I was drawn to working for Marie Claire magazine, which always felt like it covered global issues as well as fabulous fashion and beauty.

When my parents met being in a mixed-race relationship was unusual, and at times they met hostility in the street. Growing up, as mixed-race children, my brother and I felt ‘different’ particularly when we left our home in London to visit relatives in other parts of the UK. People would point and stare at us and even ask to touch our hair. Today interracial relationships are more commonplace, but prejudice still exists in our society, it’s just less overt. I’ve always chosen partners based on shared values and basic attraction rather than race.

As a child, I often felt like an outsider, different. But as I became an adult I came to see my ethnicity as a positive thing. I like being a bit different, drawing on two different cultures. Being mixed-race is also much more commonplace now in our societies. I love being of dual heritage. It offers me different insights and a deeper understanding of certain issues and an instant connection with other mixed-race people. We’re always fascinated by each other’s backgrounds. 

The main challenges are having been a witness to casually racist language, and statements in situations where being mixed-race means in the moment people feel you’re not ‘really Black’. Today if this happens I speak up about it, but earlier in my career I was less confident in doing so.

I regularly visit Barbados and feel a real sense of peace when I’m there, its feels like a second home. It’s been important for me to introduce my two boys, aged 8 and 5, to the country too. They love that they have a connection to Barbadian culture. 

I have experienced casual racism at points in my career. Things have improved but we still have a long way to go to make people of all races and cultures feel comfortable in modern workplaces. Now I’m the Editor of women’s magazine @marieclaireuk. I’m trying to build a more inclusive and diverse workplace where everyone regardless of their background, race or sexual orientation can thrive. I’ve also worked hard to create content that is diverse and inclusive of all women. 

Following the brutal killing of George Floyd, it feels like we are at a watershed moment in the politics of race. Seeing people of all races marching against injustice around the world has been amazing. It’s good to see the conversations that have been ignited; the people openly calling out injustice they’ve witnessed in their own lives, educating themselves about colonial history, and standing together to push for change to the societal structures that have allowed racism to persist for so long.  I’m hopeful about the future.