Ashkenazi Jewish | Yemeni/Syrian/Uzbek
I am White and Yemeni/Uzbek/Levantine. My Mum (who is Jewish) raised me Jewish. I don’t know how I ‘identify’ myself. I think it is strange how there is a spotlight on gender and identity, but for race we are still expected to tick a box. Maybe I just identify as a human being.
My Mum is from England, she is Ashkenazi Jewish. Most of her heritage stems from Eastern Europe; Ukraine, Lithuania and Poland. In the 80’s she emigrated to Israel which is where she met my Father. My Father was born in Israel, but he is an absolute melting pot of cultures. My Father is half Yemeni, a quarter Syrian and a quarter Uzbek. My parents divorced when I was young. My Mother tried her best to combine bits of my Middle Eastern heritage, but generally I was brought up English and Ashkenazi Jewish. Whilst my Mother was married to my Father she became very close with his family and learned how to make lots of traditional recipes from the region, some of which she still makes today. Notably Osh Plov, Iranian rice and Yemeni chicken soup! My Father did very little to connect me with my heritage. Only recently himself he has taken more of an interest in where he comes from. I’ve absolutely loved seeing photos of my distant Yemeni and Uzbek relatives.
Interracial relationships are now the norm, and so they should be. It is wonderful to share your culture with a partner and have the chance to explore theirs. When I have children, I want them to embrace all parts of their culture, and I see it as my responsibility to ensure they know where they’ve come from. My culture doesn’t affect my choice in partners.
Having another culture within me that is so different and exotic in comparison to my surroundings is fascinating within itself. I’ve embraced being ‘interesting’ more as I’ve gotten older, especially as I’m able to learn more new things about my heritage all the time and adopt new parts of the culture that I identify with.
At least weekly I am asked ‘so where are you really from’, my answer usually fascinates people. Most people see being mixed-race as being half Black and half White. Any discrimination is usually due to ignorance rather than my actual heritage. I’m what you’d call ‘racially ambiguous’ so I’ve even had racial slurs that aren’t even close to my genetic make-up. I’ve been called racial slurs relating to other ethnic minorities, and I’ve been told to go back to where I come from. When I went to the USA people largely thought I was Mexican. When people I know make racist comments, I sometimes wonder what they think about me behind my back.
People are desperate to label one another; I pass more as Middle Eastern than I do as White, so people often invalidate my Whiteness. People sometimes don’t think you’re Jewish unless you look like Woody Allen or Anne Frank. I think people should stop trying to put one another in boxes.
I’ve connected to my cultures mostly with food. I’m determined to learn how to cook more Middle Eastern and central Asian cuisine but being vegetarian it may be a challenge, most of what they eat is heavily meat based!
Visiting my native countries is something I need to do, especially to Uzbekistan and the Caucasus, as I can’t really visit Syria or Yemen. This year I’m planning a trip to Israel so that I can connect with my paternal family more. Food is a big part of Jewish culture, and I’d love to learn more recipes and traditions from my Yemeni, Levantine and Central Asian roots to bring back home to my friends and family.
At school I wanted to hide my exoticness (difficult when you look like me) so that I’d fit in with my predominantly White and middle-class friends. I straightened my hair and got blonde highlights. I never told anyone about my Father’s background. I didn’t want to eat malawach and kibbeh, I wanted to eat sandwiches from M&S! I think all kids just want to blend in though, and perhaps I’d have been different had my dad helped me to embrace his culture more when I was younger.
Sometimes I do think my workplace is inclusive of my culture, gender and sexuality, and sometimes I don’t. I work as a consultant, so I am usually on client site elsewhere. My company has lots of inclusive events, groups, and guidelines etc to ensure its employees are all treated equally and with respect. The hiring is pretty diverse, and I’ve met all sorts of colleagues; LGBT, BAME, and those from varying socioeconomic backgrounds. Nonetheless I still am not safe from institutional racism, and my company can’t protect me whilst I am with a client. I often wonder if I was a white man called John if my job would be any easier.
If I had the opportunity to be reborn I would return still as me, but a little taller (I’m only 5’2)! Yes I know that is a bit size-ist but I’d like to live in a world where I can just clothes without needing to visit a tailor!