Irish | Jamaican

Photo credit: provided by subject

I identify as a gay and mixed-race; my Mum is Jamaican, and my Dad is Irish. My parents met at school, after my Mum moved back to the UK from Jamaica. Music was a huge part of combining their cultures, a lot of reggae and soul music. Food was a big staple at my Nan’s house who provided a real taste of Jamaica every week. 

I grew up in a predominantly White area, so I think it had an influence. I never saw people like myself as a gay mixed-race man, it's only now that I see this in London more frequently and can appreciate the beauty that it brings to straight and gay relationships in a cosmopolitan area.

As a gay man I have certainly hidden parts of my identity. An example of this is in the workplace. There have been other times in certain crowds in the past, although not for a good few years. At school it was difficult, I liked both parts of my upbringing but certain elements of Black culture were frowned upon and also derided in some quarters, not so much diversity. Societies from the elder generation had it much harder, they were brave to mix and had to endure so much shame, negativity and social labelling for daring to love. They certainly helped challenge and change the minds and fabric of society. 

Today's interracial relationships are certainly not without their obstacles, many negative perceptions still remain about other cultures through racist tropes. From the actions of our elders it has given us the tools to challenge and change the thinking of society and will one day hopefully extirpate the negative racial thinking in our world.

I have never visited my native countries, I'm in two minds about it. Part of me would love to go but on the flip side as a gay man and mixed-race I'm unsure of the reception I would receive due to family experiences. 

My outlook has progressed to the point where I'm extremely proud of being diverse and embrace both sides of me. I'm neither Black or White, and don't need to conform to the limited stereotypical notions of what people perceive that either race should be like. I will continue to celebrate myself, other cultures and challenge micro-aggressions and racism. 

My workplace is considerate of gender equality, but there's a lack of diversity in managerial roles and senior positions, when it's clear there are plenty of people capable of doing these roles. I can't speak much on sexuality as there are some very supportive people, and the two negative experiences I encountered were with people willing to learn and grow from negative thinking. 

If I had the opportunity to be reborn, I would love to be born with the knowledge I have now, but hindsight is a wonderful thing. 

During the pandemic I’ve found disconnecting from social media where possible was a great help. Yoga, writing thoughts and feelings down, also running a podcast and writing things for Medium to help work through past issues.