British | Nigerian

Photo credit: @willbeach_ (Instagram)

I identify as British/African, Christian & heterosexual. I’m currently waiting on some ancestry DNA results, so I can have a broader understanding but to my knowledge, my Mom is welsh and quarter English and my Pops is Nigerian. My parents met in a nightclub in Oxford in ‘94. The combining of cultures both my parents have was challenging for them when bringing me up. There was no compromise, so I was exposed to both cultures unapologetically and had to make my own choice on how to embrace both.

I think interracial relationships are beautiful. Like any partnership there are challenges and although I find that interracial relationships come with its own bag of potential obstacles, I feel that two different cultures can complement each other without clashing if respect and acceptance is at the core. I’d say my culture has always affected the way I choose my partners. I’m extremely proud to be half African and feel personally that it’s important I grow and build with someone of a similar ethnicity who understands my roots and nurtures them.

I’m fortunate, as the majority of experiences I’ve had with being mixed-race have been positive. I’ve had some really blessed conversations about being born into interracial relationship and the culture differences. I guess I’ve been able to do my bit to help educate others who have questions. I have experienced a few challenges. At times I’ve had African communities stating that I can’t call myself African because I’m half Caucasian and consequently being mocked for being invested in my culture as much as I am. On the flip side, I’ve found certain Caucasian communities look at me like I’m an outsider and show a level of judgement because I’m half African. 99.9% of students at my school were Caucasian and I experienced bullying due to my hair texture, the music I listened to and the food I brought in with me at times.

I’m connected to both sides of my cultures. I’ve been heavily influenced by African music, food, dance, language and fashion to a degree. I learnt from young how to cook traditional Nigerian dishes, my pops taught me his mother-tongue (Igbo) and I spent a lot of time in Nigeria over the years. I’m connected to my Welsh side also, in terms of cooking traditional Welsh dishes, speaking the language and engaging in yearly Welsh festivals that I still attend. I enjoy digging into the history of both cultures. There’s a rich history on either side. I used to go visit my family in Nigeria twice a year and would stay for a lengthy amount of time. My Pops wanted me to experience village life first and foremost, so I hung out in the village with my Grandma and headed to the city in my late teens. 

When I was a kid I wanted to be Caucasian. I did everything I knew just to lighten my skin. I felt like there was no community for me to fit in, the Black community would say I was White, and the White community would say I was black. Attending a predominantly Caucasian school, my hair was not understood, and I was often shut down for having ‘messy’ hair, when it was just an afro. I ended up chemically straightening my hair and using lightening powder on my face and body to blend in with the other students. That mentally got wiped when I was about 18 years old. I started to celebrate my ethnicity once I took the time to fully understand what it meant and power behind it. I believe my mind has arrived at its final destination and if there is any change in thought, it would just be more passion and power towards my ethnicity.

My workplace is inclusive. I’ve used that space again to try educating those who have questions. I’ve also introduced my colleagues to some of the traditional dishes from both cultures and even certain lingo and terminology. 

If I were to be born again, I’d want to be reborn as me and go through everything I’ve gone through all over again but maybe with a few extra wiser decisions.

I’m also a Rapper/Singer, here is my latest EP ‘Care City’ .