Indonesian | Seychellois

My Mum is Indonesian and my Dad is from Seychelles but grew up in Kenya and moved around a lot in East Africa from Tanzania to Zimbabwe. My Mother came here to London to work for the Indonesian Embassy for a few years originally and my Dad moved here with his Mother and siblings in his teens. I grew up with Indonesian culture as my parents split when I was quite young. So I had always thought I could identify as Indonesian as I went to Indonesia regularly, loved their food and I speak Bahasa. My Mum would take me to Semarang in Central Java where she was born and the capital Jakarta to see my family.

My cousins back home would always refer to me as the ‘English cousin’ whilst in London my friends referred to me as the ‘Indonesian girl’, I tried so hard to prove to people back home of my Indonesian heritage regardless of being mixed and speaking English. It was me who wanted to learn my Mum's native language as well as the formal language so I could communicate better with my cousins and other relatives back home. I'm glad my Mum encouraged this!

When I was younger, I had major identity issues growing up as a teen. I looked nothing like my Mother (apart from my eyes and nose) but everything else was my Dad. It was hard as I didn't have another culture to identify with growing up so I tried so hard to fit in from straightening my thick curly ringlet hair to making myself look lighter or adding a wing-liner to the end of my eyes to accentuate them more. I felt so frustrated as I felt I was the only one like this.

My outlook has changed drastically from when I was a child to an adult. I embrace the fact I have loads of cultures embedded in me. I see it as unique rather than an outcast. I'm learning to accept my flaws and my good traits. I used to get worried about what my child would say if they were asked where they were from but now I am not so worried as society has changed a bit.

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