English | Korean
As a child, I disliked being half-Korean and wanted to be fully English. I was never proud to be mixed-race because in the area I lived most people would only associate it with being half Black half White, and if I tried to claim being mixed-race I would get laughed at and told I am not mixed-race. It hurt me that people assumed my White Father was not related to me (I was a Daddy's girl) and I hated children remarking on my features in school which was predominantly White in a suburban area. I shunned my Mother trying to teach me Korean culture and language and would retort to her 'I am English!', and watched her try less and less. This is something I deeply regret, as I can't imagine how difficult it must have been for my Mother to have her own daughter push her culture away.
I am also separated from my Mother's family in Korea which takes its toll on enhancing my Korean speaking skills. For these reasons and more, I am passionate about sharing Korean culture and learning more about it myself. I only really started to embrace my heritage when the Hallyu wave began in the early 2000s and I saw non-Koreans embracing Korean music and drama and food. When I saw K Pop stars that resembled my own features I began to take more pride in my looks and Korean culture. Ironically, whenever I visit my Korean family I feel a different kind of connection with them than I do with my English family. It's a different way of showing love - my English family are more reserved with showing feelings of affection (the stiff British upper lip), whereas my Korean family shower me with affection and love. Neither is more or less, it's just different.
As a teacher I find that the diverse community are not represented enough as teachers or within senior roles. This is a huge issue to represent diversity and for children to see those in positions of power that resemble them - especially in places with a diverse demographic. Most staff either assume I was not born here and learnt English, or may ask the question , 'so where are you actually from?' to which I reply 'I'm from here', which usually comes with an awkward laugh and confusion.
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