Dutch | Surinamese Creools

I am mixed-race woman from a White Dutch mother and a Black Surinam Father, they call it also Creools. It’s a mix of African, Arawak Indian, Chinese and Jewish. The Father from my Father is from a black Creools Father and a (White) Jewish mother (probably Portuguese Jewish). The Mother of my Father is from a Black African Father and an Arawak Indian Mother. My Mother is Dutch, and my Father is Black Surinam Creools (a mix of African, Arawak Indian, Chinese and Jewish). When I was 25 years old I suddenly really recognised/ understood that I was really different from my White friends, before that I already knew I was not Black because when I went out with my Black friends always reminded me I was not because I didn’t know things about food or Surinam words and such. So it was really difficult. I felt I didn’t belong anywhere. For my White friends I was Black and with my Black friends I was White. I have been a professional artist (dancer, singer, actress) for over 20 years, starting in the late eighties early nighties and when I had to audition it was always a struggle to find a part for me. They wanted to put me in a box. Are you white or are black? And most of the time they said just go for the Latina parts than you will have the most success. So, I did. I had lots of success being a chameleon. Later in the zero’s it didn’t change much either. When I was filling in the questionnaire for casting agency’s I never could find my boxes such as, eye colour, hair, race, background. I had to choose between boxes that were neither one of me. It really made me angry and sad. Positive experiences are that I can move like a chameleon (sometimes it is really convenient). Also, I can belong everywhere If I act in a certain way. So still being myself and acting like a chameleon can be a good thing. Also now as I am getting older I like my looks a lot, I like my hair and most parts of my strong body which is powerful & curvy. If I had the opportunity to be born again I would be me but than from the start already in line with both sides of my background, so I could develop a strong vision about it.

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