British | Indian
When I have to tick boxes, I say I’m from mixed British/Asian heritage, but in general conversation I just refer to myself as mixed-race. My mum is from India but was the first in her family to be born in the UK. My dad is a British Jew. They met through work. My mum was a fashion designer and my dad used to sell trimmings wholesale. I was lucky enough to be born and bred London. I went to a small Catholic girls’ school, where 90% of the students were White, so I knew from early that I wasn’t quite the same as everyone else. But actually understanding the reality of being mixed-race didn’t happen until much later. Before visiting India for the first time in 2016, my boyfriend, who is also mixed-race, and I had a conversation about identity. We spoke about Otherness and being unable to assimilate fully into any one culture. It was a weird moment for me because I’d never vocalised these feelings before. Up until then I’d accepted I wasn’t White but never questioned why I found most family scenarios uncomfortable - British and Indian. The ensuing trip only validated my feelings. I went to India expecting acceptance but instead felt Whiter than ever. I think people still believe that being mixed-race means you’re half White half Black, which is frustrating because it means people that don’t fit in that stereotype are left in limbo having to involuntarily validate their existence. A negative about being mixed-race is being unable to identify with either of my parents wholly. My father once told me I wasn’t mixed-race, I’m British and shouldn’t have any issues surrounding identity, which was overwhelming to say the least. Saying that, it’s 100% a blessing being from a mixed background. I find I’m automatically more open to diversity and view difference as a positive, not something to fear or defame. We are a rapidly growing sector of society and I don’t think we’re far off from running out of appropriate tick boxes entirely. I can’t wait until it actually isn’t possible to label everyone. We’re all human!
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